Gong Xi Fa Cai

I'm still very much open-handed in case you want to give me a little red packet that emanates a blinding gold light when I open it, thank you.





I need more substance to keep this blog alive.




Substances like these....

Hot substance.(the left or the right, you decide)

Sexy substance.(amanda, it's a downrightstraightforward compliment, no sarcasm. i miss your laughter.)

and maybe a little naughty substance.

Though the naughty substance is going to make kangaroos and koalas naughtier soon, i'm sure we all back here will rejoice and throw a party the moment we see the plane take off. It's quite easy to identify which plane it is, just look out for the one that you find hard to lift because
naughty substance has added on substantial substance to her already substance-filled body. Frankly, I think when she comes back, the plane won't even leave the runway. (this is utter bullshit, told ya i needed substance)

Sexy substance, on the other hand, will be celebrating being legal soon because she needs to accompany me to clubs and spread sexiness on the dance floor. She also got herself a new haircut(with bangs!!) because she knows I've a thing for girls with BANGS (i'm thinking this statement can come across wrongly). Anyway, Happy 18th Birthday! Get sexier each year.

All right, we all know the substance on the right in the 1st picture is much hotter, no thanks to himself. So hot that his display picture on MSN(which I thought was naked) looks like a degraded Calvin Klein underwear ad campaign. This new year, he's aiming for 7% of iforgotwhatitwas. All the best, my friend. By the end of this year, you can do a campaign for Victoria's Secret already, that's an upgrade.(kidding)

I think this post is rather demeaning, but I said I needed substance. What's better than substances in my life? It's a way of keeping in touch ain't it? The verdict out of this is......

I'm bored to my bones in college and abusing free internet the Msian way when I've loads of homework, an assignment and a meeting with my advisor in 15 minutes.

crap.

It's Time For.....

College Life - Worded(it's going to be wordy)

So I survived week two of college. Everyone has talked about their college life so far and I'm about to also. Yes, I'm one to be victimised by the law of conformity. (no, i've absolutely nothing to keep my blog alive)

Anyway, I think I'm starting to adapt to college life. Computing Principles is entirely IT jargon to a computer illiterate like me but I guess Mr Siva Subramaniam made it quite interesting. Yes, Djians, your eyes did not deceive you. I indeed have a lecturer who goes by that name but I assure you he must be the good side that the Siva in school lost many many years ago, although he tends to be a little cynical at times. His jokes are..erm...cynically funny.


I think DJ misses me too much. Not only I have a lecturer with the same name, my English lecturer reminds me terribly of Pn. Cecilia (no complains). My Calculus lecturer, on the other hand, is a young, handsome, tall, smart and charming man who acts a lot like a cool version of Sherlock Holmes. Everything is elementary for him, though he prefers the term 'kindergarten'. Just a note, girls, he's taken. Just got married. Timing is everything, the early bird gets the worm.


I do miss secondary school a lot. My friends and all. I'm getting to know new people in college, one of them a male Japanese student who happens to be rather good looking with a sense of style , and this one is not taken yet, girls. I think. (Why do I feel like I'm turning my blog into some website for online dating? )


So, to those who claim they hate college. Just think back to the day when you first stepped foot into secondary school. It's the same feeling. Everything is brand new and this is what life is all about. Changes, changes and more changes. Embrace the past, live the present and anticipate the future.

Oh Dear

In less than 24 hours, I won't have to cheat my way through the 18+ movies at the theatre.

My, my, how time flies.

Now I Know!

Facebook is gradually overtaking the once popular Friendster as the new age networking phenomenon.
probably because Facebook has tons of applications such as my personal 'favourite' Pet Society.
and less lala people too.

Researchers at the University of Georgia asked untrained observers to look at the profiles of 130 Facebook users.

Study indicated that the profiles have glamorous self portraits, long lists of friends and self promoting wall comments. Author Keith Campbell says, 'Narcissists are using Facebook the same way they use their other relationships:for self promotion.'

I finally know why I'm a sucker for Facebook.

i think i lost blogging mojo.

Shoes Sent Flying

Brownchoc

Mr. President

Somehow I think it's deja vu
or the opposite

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The following is why we remember our high school prom for years to come.

King. Looking *insert adjective here*

Almost queen...*ah..fried rice*


100% queen.


Which one is the million dollar picture?
You decide.

One Last Dance and Hello World.

I'm not missing you...yet.

it was beautiful while it lasted.

it had to be. the night's beauty came with a rm1000+ price tag.

Go to Facebook for more beautiful pictures.

p/s: i've a priceless picture of the prom king and the prom committee chairperson. both very candid.

I Knew My Name Was Sexy

What Nigeltehjaeshing Means

You are very intuitive and wise. You understand the world better than most people. You also have a very active imagination. You often get carried away with your thoughts. You are prone to a little paranoia and jealousy. You sometimes go overboard in interpreting signals. You tend to be pretty tightly wound. It's easy to get you excited... which can be a good or bad thing. You have a lot of enthusiasm, but it fades rather quickly. You don't stick with any one thing for very long. You have the drive to accomplish a lot in a short amount of time. Your biggest problem is making sure you finish the projects you start. You are deeply philosophical and thoughtful. You tend to analyze every aspect of your life. You are intuitive, brilliant, and quite introverted. You value your time alone. Often times, you are grumpy with other people. You don't appreciate them trying to interfere in your affairs. You are friendly, charming, and warm. You get along with almost everyone. You work hard not to rock the boat. Your easy going attitude brings people together. At times, you can be a little flaky and irresponsible. But for the important things, you pull it together. You are relaxed, chill, and very likely to go with the flow. You are light hearted and accepting. You don't get worked up easily. Well adjusted and incredibly happy, many people wonder what your secret to life is. You are a seeker. You often find yourself restless - and you have a lot of questions about life. You tend to travel often, to fairly random locations. You're most comfortable when you're far away from home. You are quite passionate and easily tempted. Your impulses sometimes get you into trouble. You are truly an original person. You have amazing ideas, and the power to carry them out. Success comes rather easily for you... especially in business and academia. Some people find you to be selfish and a bit overbearing. You're a strong person. You are fair, honest, and logical. You are a natural leader, and people respect you. You never give up, and you will succeed... even if it takes you a hundred tries. You are rational enough to see every part of a problem. You are great at giving other people advice. You are usually the best at everything ... you strive for perfection. You are confident, authoritative, and aggressive. You have the classic “Type A” personality. You are the total package - suave, sexy, smart, and strong. You have the whole world under your spell, and you can influence almost everyone you know. You don't always resist your urges to crush the weak. Just remember, they don't have as much going for them as you do.

What's Your Name's Hidden Meaning?

Yes, i've nothing better to do.

Note to Self- Must Watchs

Praying for Time

PRAYING FOR TIME
These are the days of the open hand
They will not be the last
Look around now
These are the days of the beggars and the choosers

This is the year of the hungry man
Whose place is in the past
Hand in hand with ignorance
And legitimate excuses

The rich declare themselves poor
And most of us are not sure
If we have too much
But we'll take our chances'
Cause God's stopped keeping score
I guess somewhere along the way
He must have let us all out to play
Turned his back and all God's children
Crept out the back door

And it's hard to love, there's so much to hate
Hanging on to hope
When there is no hope to speak of
And the wounded skies above say it's much, much too late
Well maybe we should all be praying for time

These are the days of the empty hand
Oh you hold on to what you can
And charity is a coat you wear twice a year
This is the year of the guilty man
Your television takes a stand
And you find that what was over there is over here

So you scream from behind your door
Say what's mine is mine and not yours
I may have too much but I'll take my chances'
Cause God's stopped keeping score
And you cling to the things they sold you
Did you cover your eyes when they told you
That he can't come back'
Cause he has no children to come back for

It's hard to love there's so much to hate
Hanging on to hope when there is no hope to speak of
And the wounded skies above say it's much too late
So maybe we should all be praying for time

"No event inspired the song. It's my way of trying to figure out why it's so hard for people to be good to each other. I believe the problem is conditional as opposed to being something inherent in mankind. The media has affected everybody's consciousness much more than most people will admit. Because of the media, the way the world is perceived is as a place where resources and time are running out. We're taught that you have to grab what you can before it's gone. It's almost as if there isn't time for compassion." - George Michael

The 125 massacred in Mumbai might be just a statistic for us watching here across the ocean. But in that 125, it means the whole world to those who lost the ones they loved.

What has become of our world today?

Can we still call it a world?

Or have we moved to become neighbours of hell?

Peace of Mind

We are yet again witnessing another clash of the illiterate. Those who think they know better. But I got the better of them. haha





So, FATWA. What does it even stand for? Don't bother, don't care, don't give two hoots. It had such a low profile before this unnecessary issue came along. Ask someone if they know FATWA and they'll go 'what did you just say? FAT WHAT? FAT AH? I'm fat meh?'




This whole yoga issue might just be a publicity gimmick for people to remember by. Well, I don't blame them at all- religion is one very forgettable part in life. Believe me, I know best. Ask me Islamic History now and see for yourself. I believe most of our religions teach us to lead a simple life and avoid greed. Yet, I guess it's part of evolution in this increasingly materialistic world that the line at the Magnum, TOTO and DaMaCai in the evening is mental.




Let's not stray away. That's a whole different story.







What is FATWA's stand on this issue? Yoga will intoxicate the minds of people and divert the teachings of Islam because it contains Hindu practice. racist much.

'Pensyarah Fakulti Pengajian Islam Universiti Kebangsaan Malaysia Prof Zakaria Stapa berkata pergerakan senaman yoga adalah berdasarkan unsur agama Hindu yang dikhuatiri boleh memesongkan akidah umat Islam yang mengamalkannya.'

What....a genius.




The guy better be afraid of the Sisters in Islam(pro-yoga people). Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned, watch out.







Let me ask you frankly and you give an honest answer.

Does this look threatening to your religion?

If yes, go to your mosque/temple/church/wat and spend the rest of your life hibernating there. Your faith in your own religion is too shaky.

You know, it's only a matter of time before they have The Complete Pocket Idiot's Guide to 108 Pathetic Reasons Why Fatwa is Against Yoga.

So, when they're done with yoga...they'll move on to taichi, qigong so on and so forth.

People would then fight for their rights and then our Pendidikan Moral subject in school would have more values.

Kebebasan Beryoga, Kebebasan Bertaichi and Kebebasan Berqigong, perhaps? this is meant to pull the legs of those who are still forced to learn that blessedly silly subject that I don't for the rest of my life.

Didn't you know? One foolish thing leads on to another foolish thing. It's a chain reaction. Foolishness is rampant. fatwa taught us that didn't they?

Whoa!

I would like to congratulate myself for 2 things.

- I survived 90% of SPM. Still living, breathing and probably smiling.

- I actually managed to restrain myself from blogging. I thought I would break the promise initially. *gives pat on own back*


Well, since SPM is semi-history, this shall also be a semi-completed post. EST isn't done, mind you.

But you bet I've something to say about FATWA's yoga ruling.....

Won't be blogging till SPM is over and done with.

I think I've become overly nerdified until I am now unable to make this non-permanent farewell sound interesting.

Back to my beloved Prophet Muhammad.

and 'char siew pao' in case I get too emotionally involved.

Animalistic

Is it me or are humans getting more animalistic as we age?

We say that we are people of the 21st century yet I don't think we are of much difference compared to our ancestors in the Neolithic Age.


You read the news about a robber BITING a police officer. Yes, biting. That is just low, real low. The evolution process in life thankfully gave us useful limbs to utilise, so why bite? I mean, even the tiger will use its limbs to 'karate' if it could.


and then there are some who.....


commit animalistic acts in the jungle. Raping is really animal-like. Rapists think that they can just 'do' it as easy as animals. Who do they think Penan women are, treating them like animals? It really makes you wonder doesn't it? Is the human or monkey more animal-like in the jungle?

Now, there's another concrete proof that we are indeed from monkeys.

I think this blog has quite a lot of good articles that relate humans and animals.

Remember the elephants and women?

PSA

3 Reasons Why This Works in U.S.

(i) The influence Hollywood has on the people of the U.S. stretches out far and wide. C'mon,girls...it's hottie Leonardo diCaprio!

(ii) Psychology has been very established in U.S. so reverse psychology does seem to have effect.

(iii) The media in U.S. has more freedom and less censorship as compared to 'you-know-where'.


3 Reasons Why This Won't Work in M'sia.

(i) Ask yourself, how many influential celebrities are there in M'sia? Can't make heads or tails? Just imagine Siti/Misha/Anita saying exactly the same things and doing what Michelle Trachtenberg did with her bra. *uggh, bad sight*

(ii) Tell a Msian about psychology and chances are....."So you deal with people in Tanjung Rambutan ah?"

(iii) A Public Service Announcement(PSA) this frank will call for another 'SA'. Without the 'P' but with an 'I'. Forgive the indirect statement, I've to be aware. Haven't we all learn from that journalist? The next thing you know, I might be taken into custody because 'my life is threatened and I need protection'.

I'm a Nine

It started with Pythagoras, the Greek mathematician who invented the a2 + b2 = c2 Pythagorean Theorem, the only equation I remember from eleventh grade geometry. In 6th century BCE, Pythagoras combined mysticism with mathematics to construct a quotient about the future of one’s life. He coined it Pythagorean numerology and used numbers assigned to the letters in one’s full name (as well as using the numbers in one’s date of birth). The numerology determined what innate abilities one was given at birth to determine what might happen late in life, and it has become the source for modern numerology today.


How Numerology Works
When working with a name, numbers have corresponding letters. The numbers are added up and broken down into single digits in order to give you your final Destiny Number.

The Number Assignments
1= A, J, S
2= B, K, T
3= C, L, U
4= D, M, V
5= E, N, W
6= F, O, X
7= G, P, Y
8= H, Q, Z
9= I, R

How to Find Your Destiny Number
Write down your full name (first, middle, and last). This is the name you were given at birth—not your married name, etc.

Using the table above, write down the number matched to each letter in each name (i.e. AMANDA = 1, 4, 1, 5, 4, 1).

Add the numbers together for each name (i.e. 1+4+1+5+4+1= 16).

You will most likely get a double digit for each name; break down each double digit number you get by adding the first and second digit to get one number (i.e. from the 16 above, add together 1+6 to get 7, which is the number for my first name).

Add up the final numbers you get from each name (i.e. my middle name number is 8 and my last name number is 10, so 7+8+10 = 25).

Once again, break down any double-digit numbers into one digit to get your final Destiny Number (i.e. from the 25 above, add together 2+5 to get 7, which is my final Destiny Number).

In numerology, the basic vibrations are numbers 1 through 9, but the numbers 11 and 22 are master numbers and should not be reduced to a single digit since these are master vibrations.
There are plenty of books and Web sites that will give you a thorough analysis of your Destiny Number, but here’s a basic rundown on what your Destiny Number means for you:

1 is determined, autonomous, and self-reliant
2 is loyal, tactful, and analytical
3 is passionate, positive, and fun-loving
4 is sensible, traditional, and serious
5 is bold, temperamental, and sensual
6 is responsible, cautious, and domestic
7 is spiritual, unconventional, and somewhat reclusive
8 is money-oriented, assured, and authoritative
9 is versatile, compassionate, and worldly
11 is enlightened, deep, and high-strung
22 is ambitious, a global planner, and motivated

http://www.aboutnumerology.com/destinymeanings.php (for more detailed explanation)

Try it out. I did it because I wanted to have fun with numbers and love them again. 2 hours of Maths can make you a little annoyed with it.

Fish!

Since my last post was about phobias, this shall be about philias.

and....

I think I'm Fishyphilia.


Fishes are just simply amazing, don't you think?
They're our source of essential protein.

They are the characters of good Disney cartoons, think Little Mermaid(well she is technically a fish) and Nemo!

They're used by angry teens to curse when they don't have the guts to say fuck.(whoops)

and and and


best of all...


they freaking love our shit. yes. that shit that comes out from our anus.
There is no other animal(i hope) that fights each other to eat shit.
Don't ask how I developed love for these fishes. Let's just say it's a little trip to a fishing village in Pangkor.

I JUST LOVE THEM BECAUSE THEY LOVE MY SHIT LAH.

It's so flattering.

talking abt being flattered.

lay shu, you're the inspiration for this post.

be flattered.

Are You Chocolactophobic?

In the wake of the milk scandal, I think I've developed Lactophobia, or specifically

CHOCOLACTOPHOBIA.

It's time they add this in the list of phobias. But, I'm still enjoying chocolate milk. We can trust Dutch Lady can't we?

Anyway, the Domestic Trade and Consumers' Affairs Ministry has a new crop of superhero enforcers. They're called*DRUM ROLLS*

THE HOUSEWIVES!

Call of Duty: Justice for all against the wet market ah peks who increase the prices of goods as they like it.

Motto: One housewife for all and all housewives for one.

Salary: -RM1500/month + Commission( varies depending on the amount of bribe given by ah peks) + free chicken/fish/vegetables(depending on type of stall raided)

Weapons of Choice:

Now, you really got to fear The Housewife.

And you think corporate women are powerful?

anyway, the greenest city is New York.

Yes, I never would have guessed correctly too.

The Benefits of Being Homeless

can be narrowed down to one- GOING GREEN.(which is what everyone is saying nowadays)

TOP 5 Reasons

#5 : Being homeless makes it easier for you to hang out together-you just flock in the same alley/dumpster/welfare centre hence no need to use any motor vehicles to travel.

#4: You go back to the basics of going green. Reduce, Reuse and Recycle. Homeless people are the masters at this I tell you. Everything from the 'bed' they sleep on to the food the scavenge fit the 3Rs.

#3: You can also help reduce energy consumption and save kachings. Let's do the math.

No home+No electricity=No bills

#2: You help to reduce the demand for houses therefore less deforestation. Less trees get chopped down, the earth still green.

#1: Because this issue was raised by 3 people who had nothing better to do one fine recess in the library and I came up with the idea so you accept it. Btw, do you know which city is considered the greenest city in the world? Answer in the cbox if you do. =D

Let's just all be homeless.

Of Elephants and Women

The idea of this post came about after I read an article about elephants' memory.

And the first line was....

Similarity #1:Women and elephants never forget an injury.
Ah, maybe maybe. Elephants react negatively towards the sight and scent of clothing worn by members of the African Maasai tribe because Maasai men hunt elephants as a display of their masculinity. When women suffer an injury to the heart, literally, they never forget the man who broke it. Then suddenly the homo sapien tribe called men are jerks.



Similarity #2: Women and elephants are far more thoughtful mammals.
This is very true to a certain extent. Elephants follow a formalized family structure with older females called matriarchs, at the top and daughter elephants always stick close to their mothers. Male elephants leave the family at around 14 years of age or whenever they reach sexual maturity. So how many of our families have the mummys being the boss of the house? Oh, and they always say that daughters would be the ones sticking with mummy in the end even after they get married. Sons will just become slaves for their wives(wth). When we were little boys, we would go "Yay, mummy bought me a new Ultraman underwear!" and when we reach sexual maturity, mummy would have to rope us to buy an underwear.



Similarity #3: Women and elephants are very very persistent, persuasive and not to mention pushy.
Elephants are so persistent with grudges that they remember trainers or keepers who mistreated them. I'm not too sure about women with grudges. But, one thing's for sure- 5/6 people who left the "just blog laa" in my chatbox were women. Ahah, betcha didn't know you guys were test subjects. Muahahaha! For Julian.....we shall just let pass.



Similarity #4: Women and elephants have a way with their legs.
Elephants have many forms of communication to keep up with each other. One method for spatially locating other elephants is through the bundles of nerve sensors in their feet called Pacinian corpuscles. Even their toenails contain nerves that discern where sounds come from. Do we even need to mention this? Women, nail saloon and pedicures. Wannabe princesses communicate(gossip) while having their toe nails done.



Similarity #5: Elephants and women can cause rampage.
Well, we all know what happens when a herd of elephants run. Devastating, you think? Well, beware of the Malaysian Mega Sale then. Whenever you see a sign that says, "SALE. 70% off", there are two things you have to realise.
No. 1: You are no longer in a shopping complex but in the African outbacks.
No. 2: Run for cover because old women/young women/ah lians/see lais/lala muis are going to make the ground shake. Even if the Sichuan people are there, will say that they have never felt anything like it.

With that, don't you think women and elephants are just so similar? Primates may not be the only ones closest to our species. Wouldn't it be great if women have trunks? Then they can conveniently shower themselves and not snatch our bathrooms and hog them for hours. Want to know the only difference?

Oh damn I sound like a broken record but who cares....

Elephants definitely do not say "I feel fat" after pigging out. Women on the other hand.....

Abstinence is Key

Abstain. Abstain.

No blogging till exams are over.

Is it me or is this getting more ironic than it already is?

i just need a little push.

someone to say,

"just blog lah"